pairs of shoes

Had double mid-terms (back-to-back from 9-10, then 10-11) last Wednesday... so typical me woke up at the crack of dawn to worry about them and stuff whatever remaining info I could dig out into my brain. This is such a ridiculous habit. Rest is way more important. 

But!!! I woke up to this! :) Opened my blinds to the most amazing sunrise ever.

Faint orange glow of hope

"Life is a great sunrise." - Vladimir Nabokov

It was a great sign, I thought. Then look at my tweet and my mental clarity for that moment...

HAHA. Epitome of tiredness and worry.

***

Why worry?

"Come to me, all who labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest.

Take my yoke upon you, and learn from me, for I am gentle and lowly in heart,

and you will find rest for your souls.

For my yoke is easy, and my burden is light."

- Matthew 11:28-30

"Peace I leave with you; my peace I give to you.

Not as the world gives do I give to you.

Let not your hearts be troubled, neither let them be afraid."

- John 14:27

Anyway, check this out:

This is what I stare at everyday. Right outside my window.

Forsaken pair of shoes

Always wondered which poor soul had this prank played on him. I mean, a good ol' pair of running shoes. Perfectly seasoned, maybe of sentimental value? To have somebody do this to his belongings against his will - was he angry? Was he compensated?

A multitude of shoes hanging like ornaments on another tree...

Then it occurred to me that they did it on purpose, as a way to "leave their mark." Meh.
They're really obvious now that it's winter and the trees are bare.

Haiku #1:

Chills, barren trees stand.

Apathetic, oblivious, 

To time urgency.

chop house; (useless) study break update

There are not enough hours in the morning. My best study times are in the morning at Runk (but only during weekdays though, brunch times in the weekends are madhouse), perched on one of the hard benches by the giant windows, where the sunlight streams freely in. And I get unlimited access to coffee/green tea/water!!  ...ignoring weird stares from the (kinda cute) guy at the entrance for running to the bathroom every freaking half hour....

And the occasional introduction to a new catchy tune, thanks to the radio station they play.
Although today they played 'Baby Got Back'... you know, that song that goes "I like big butts and I cannot lie..."

Stuff sprawled everywhere. Rainy day...

Yeah. Come to think of it. I spend at least two and a half hours in Runk every single weekday.

My favorite tea: green with lemongrass hints.

By the way! College food just got so much better. Apparently Virginia Tech has the second best dining hall food in the nation.

Screenshot above taken from here

I guess UVa wants to match up with them Hokies, huh.

Slew of veggie mush

To be fancier, Runk and O'Hill introduced this new thing called 'The Chop House' which features steaks, salmon, and other (steakhouse-like) stuff for an extra 5 bucks (with a meal swipe), which in real life is daylight robbery, but since you already paid for the meal plan and you're stuck with a ton of plus dollars that you would have otherwise spent on (WAY) overpriced gum, cereal (a box of cheerios for SEVEN BUCKS what is this), and Pepperidge Farm Pirouettes (only for my sister Rachel), all these seem like great deals.

Side note: I chew so much gum, I've developed solid cheek muscles, NO JOKE.

Mmmm New York strip steak with
a (clean) baked sweet potato and a vegetable medley

YUMMM.... 

I love the freaking sweet potato.

Albert: *disdainful* Oh my gosh, (ew) you're so spoiled....

Lauren after her run :)
Salmon, wild rice, and... cottage cheese...

Filet mignon, medium rare. Yeah, we're pretty (very) spoiled.
Don't think I've ever had filet mignon before this...

Me: Filet Mignon! Jinggggg borrow phone I forgot my cameraaaa!!!! :D

Jing Yong: Omg. Just. Eat. The. Freaking, Meat... *fishes out iPhone from pocket*

I don't get this that often by the way. They're only open for dinners, so I'm stuck with the veggie mush.

***

After MSE today, I was so angry. I'm telling myself, I'll never do this again.
I'm gonna push forward.

pseudo-game theory

We played a game on our discussion yesterday to illustrate the effectiveness of sustainability. We fished for popcorn on a plate using straws (use your imagination), and in each round, we only needed two to survive. But that was easy, just getting two - were we supposed to get more? Why not, if we can?
I ended up getting about ten, that I never ate. Our group failed to sustain itself. I felt so ashamed.

TA: Yeah, unfortunately our session ends right at lunch time so everyone's hungry for popcorn...

Earning enough just to get by; eating enough just to get by; living enough just to get by. Why then do we push ourselves?

What makes us happy?

I need to push myself, but not for my own profits because that's not where happiness lies, am I right?

auscultation

Healing, for strength and not for drunkenness.

Her eyes are large, far apart - smooth wide curves, deep-folded are her double eyelids. The rest of her is delicate, her face disproportionally large for her elf-like body, her nose so tiny and centered between well-defined cheekbones. She's tall, yet when she kneels, she emits a kitten-like quality. She never dressed up. I thought her very pretty, but far from the quintessential, archetypal way, because nobody has outrightly agreed with me (something I found strange at the beginning). I thought her so, because I know somewhere deep inside her there's a form of insecurity that I found familiar. Deep in her eyes I sense that kind of sadness I was au fait with.

Au courant. She was flitting.

An agitation.

A flitting bird, a nibbled cookie.

old fire

Guys, I repeated it five times.

SO pathetic, okay?

Taken off F-D's blog

***

*precariously waves around bag of chocolates while talking really fast*
*pause*
Me: Sir, is it okay if I pass these around? (thinking it'll serve as a great visual/sensual addition to my topic at hand, was NOT bribing them fyi)
TA: Of course, I was just about to ask you to do that myself, with you waving that around in that tantalizing manner...

Me: OKAY *rips bag* so! When you enjoy these tasty morsels *slowly blanking out, random blonde girl walks into classroom asking for something completely irrelevant*... be sure to... KEEP IN MIND CHILD TRAFFICKING!


***

Hello everyone! :)

Ice queen of Narnia takes over the Gooch-Dillard labyrinth...

Every twig, bump and crevice lightly encrusted with a thin
layer of ice... how delicate...

"Always give them the old fire, even when you feel like a squashed cake of ice."

- Ethel Mermen

This was about three weeks ago, when Charlottesville seemed much colder than it is now. I don't know, my senses might be getting numb towards (the cold).

By the way, I discovered I ruined my favorite Pull&Bear hoodie by washing it under hot/cold. :'(


Anyway, remember my chocolate banana cake? I should never make it ever again. Too addictive. Like Honey Maid graham crackers, and cheerios without milk.

This past week has been so busy (or at least my mind was always on a constant work-overload panic mode even when it.. well... maybe wasn't exactly) but I guess that's what papers and essays always reduce me to. The actual writing takes about forty minutes. It's just all that pausing and over-thinking that drives me nuts.

Don't like. Must change.

But despite the business and the (initial) dreading, the week went by so pleasantly. :)

"And now these three remain: faith, hope, and love.

But the greatest of these is love."

1 Corinthians 13:13

Valentine's Day is coming up, (not that I'm particularly excited about it for any particularly special reason, nor am I saying: screw it!!! Boycott V-day, let's stay in and watch movies all night long!!!!), BUT the guys in Chi Alpha (or rather, XA, not... "ha? what is this chee-alpha?") organized a special dinner event for the girls at Eunoia (this "artsy" place) in which they cooked!! (i.e. a WHOLE lot of pasta lol, which was very delicious by the way :) )...

Yes, I totally took advantage of the steamed vegetables,
which took up like, 3/4 of the plate...
.... and Lauren stole my bread in the end, lol.

Joy's plate: They made pink heart-shaped pancakes for dessert!!
Imagine guys mixing up that pink batter...

It was nice, just getting to know more people in XA over a meal, and seeing everybody all dressed up. 

Chelsea: .............. OH. OMG GRACE. I COULDN'T RECOGNIZE YOU.

(another) Grace (who is Chinese with limited English vocab) : Wow Grace. You... actually have... 

Me: ..... Hmm?.... 

Other Grace: .... bones up here.... (THIS WAS AWKWARD)

Me: Uhhh??

Other Grace: .... like... I didn't know you're actually.. more skinny.... lots of bones up here....

Me: UHHHHH.......

Yes yes, nobody in UVa has ever seen me in something other than a hoodie and leggings/jeans (and no need to say that they're the SAME pair of jeans/leggings/hoodie everyday....)

Cardboard artwork decor on all the walls....

The boys were very cute. They took all our coats (and managed to sort out three huge 'coat mountains' - most of them black and long... you know how preppy these UVa kids are anyway), floated in and out of the dining area asking us every three minutes if we needed more water/lemonade (but somehow ignored Blake's need for water EVERY time lol)...

Me: Lauren. Think of how the bathroom will be absolutely CROWDED later.
Lauren: LOOLLLL

*Side thought: It's funny how the physical appearance of people changes over time, when you get to know them more. They appear to be 2-dimensional the first time you meet them, but as you get to know their personalities more, certain variants of shades and colors start developing on their features and they begin to look different. A special kind of depth is added, and you start to relate their character to those little unique physical traits they have. It's a strange kind of beauty, one that sparkles in unexpected ways when they... finally become 3-dimensional.

The cosy Eunoia lounge...
Awkward moment when they blasted "Don't Stop Believing"...

And on a final note.....

Whoa. Dillard girlllsssssss, I seeeee you! ;)

bulletproof

I think I might rebel for this one: Coffee.

Coffee makes me really happy (well duh) and I don't know if it will diminish over time (it will obviously diminish over time), but it might be a price (what price? what? huh?) I'm willing to pay every now and then. (?)
Won't get ADDICTED to coffee (this reeks of naiveness), but I'll drink it in moderation (lol what does this mean anymore) when I get tired of tea. (tea?)

*looks at above paragraph* Wow. I really know how to mock myself. No but honestly, I'm going to do this in moderation.

*during XA retreat*
Emcee: Early in the morning, now who among you are coffee drinkers, eh? I can tell who you are, you're the ones all bright-eyed and bushy-tailed, all smiles and ready to take on the world....

Sigh, after an amount of time at something, if you didn't start it out in the right frame of mind, you just end up rolling around on a prickly, mind-numbing plateau....
This honestly just means being far away from junk food with pumping music flowing in my ears.

Yes, unfortunately I'm one of those people who needs stuff like this to keep me sane on imaginary, number-less maths.

random black girl in library: Excuse me, your music is too loud *points at my earphones*

It's sad, isn't it? I need distractions now, or else I'd be distracted. The irony of that?
Distractions keep me from being distracted.
I'm sad with the way this turned out.


By the way, if you say 'black people' here, people get incredibly offended, but if you say 'asian people' here, people just... laugh. I guess it's like how we always bully and make fun of indian people back home, all in good harmless humor.









I want to go out for a run.

p.s. Please, no racial offense intended above.

protein and potassium

By the way, I concocted yet another awesome banana-involved dessert today!
This time with cottage cheese and a nice drizzle of honey on top. The smooth peanut butter on the side is a must. SUCH a good idea. If only I had a couple of drops of rum to add to it, that would have tasted amazing.

PROTEIN AND POTASSIUM (Y)

Let's hope it helped with my lame 40-minute elliptical workout which I was sweating buckets for in the gym today.

Sigh. That is all for now. (as my perfectionist nature struggles with essays. Honestly. Math isn't like this because there's just a flat, uncompromising, compassionless answer that's either clearly right or clearly wrong. Math is without compassion.)

***

Short thought.

Won't it be wonderful if people could naturally just attract positive thoughts when they are feeling negative?

So simple?

Inappropriate application of physical laws?

***

:)

peel....

Guiseeee, this is my latest obsession:

Economical little package.

Jingye: IS THAT ALLL YOU'RE EATING?!?! *looks at own plates* OMG I ADMIRE YOU!

^ She obviously doesn't know how dense and calorie-laden peanut butter is.

Bursting (!!!) with deliciousness. (!!!)

THICK, as you can see.

Nora: HOW IS THAT UNHEALTHY LA? I ate chips for dinner.

Well if you eat the same thing all the time...

This is serious la, this is how Elvis Presley freaking died LOL (other than you know... drugs...)
Well, his version also had like... bacon and was buttered on the panini grill or skillet or something of that sort...
College student. No such luxury as a panini grill.

ONE STICK OF BUTTER!?!??!!

No sticks of butter, at least won't die like this.

Rachel: Stop being so against butter. Nothing is wrong with butter, as long as you're not using it like Paula Deen...

ANTI-BUTTER BIB

Before she badgers me again, I'm REALLY just mocking myself, just saying.

...

... I am on a banana-roll.
One fine day, Runk had incredibly overripe mushy bananas with about a million brown spots on them that no one wanted to touch (Lauren: I don't know about you, but I like my bananas firm, you know...?) and had a brilliant idea.

Placed my browning bananas in the corridor, outside my room,
when I could no longer stand the smell...

Brilliant idea that totally STANK up my room. Buried them in plastic bags and baked them when I finally went over to my sister's house (to borrow her micro-USB port. Lost my phone charger again, typical me).

RIPE AND FALLING APART

Decreased the amount of sugar but
1 cup of sugar is still a scary thing to look at fyi

Doubled the muffin recipe in a springform pan...

butter-less oil-less incredibly CHOCOLATE-Y BANANA CAKE!!!

YUM...

Legit brownie-taste.

Full of healthy fats.

By the way, heard of the guy who eats 30 bananas a day? (who also does like, 24 hour solo mountain bike races)

He goes by the moniker of Durianrider, and his "fruititionist" girlfriend's name is FreeLee. Fun-Fact.

What?

Banana art.

..... Okay ANYWAY, I have a paper due tomorrow!!!!

Disclaimer: Elvis photos, butter bib, flashing banana cartoon, and banana art pictures are taken from the web, and are not produced by me.


P.S. YES, THAT'S A RAMBUTAN MAGNET ON THE WHITEBOARD ON MY DOOR! :D

poach; crib

Plain cottage cheese tastes pretty awesome. (Was desperate for a protein component for my dinner)...

Well, there are so many things I take for granted. Food is one.
Living by myself in my dorm (with acquisition of detailed knowledge regarding nutrition strangely prevalent in my nature, i.e. ramen doesn't cut it at all), with no kitchen and limited meal swipes (I get on average 1.429 swipes a day, that kinda means just a sole, pathetic, singular ticket into an all-you-can-eat dining hall per day), planning for meals tends to get... well... over-planned.

Got caught smuggling one stupid sweet potato out for dinner.

***

You spend forty-five minutes asking us to think of something so seemingly trivial, something that you could have told us in thirty seconds!

The ache for the familiar learning environment is pretty strong; I frequently catch myself dripping with sponge-like qualities, eager to gluttonize on hard facts about scientific concepts in a room full of apparent free-spirited right-brains (who do engineering!). I yearn for the luxury of interestingly listed theories to analyze in the private comforts of my own mind. The voice of my hypotheses takes its natural course and is never forced upon. Here, the curtains are forcefully torn down and my assessments, naked.

***

HELLOOOO.... just came back from the Chi Alpha winter retreat over the weekend, fresh with a newfound desire to possess scriptural wisdom and to simply rest in the Lord.

"I am the vine; you are the branches. If a man remains in me and I in him, he will bear much fruit; apart from me you can do nothing."

John 15:5

And.... I am completely swamped with work. Writing my first ever paper in college (I took a philosophy class last term and didn't even need to write a paper, and here I am in my required science and technology class writing about the MOST. FREAKY. HUMANOIDS. EVER.)




..... and waiting for my Chinese friend (a.k.a. Chinese friend FROM China i.e. a legit Chinese friend) to come back to her dorm so I can ask her questions.

***

"What's in that pot?"
"Huh? This?"
"Yeah."
"... peas and carrots."
"Why?"
"They are good for...." *interrupted*

My beautiful core group leader. :)

sauna

You'll know why the little hamster cage you call your college on-grounds housing is so expensive when you animatedly sit in front of your computer, cross-legged in shorts and a singlet, right after a 30 minute steaming hot shower.

It's hot here. They heat this place well in the dead of winter.

p.s. Environmentally unfriendly, yes yes.  > <