paper confusion

I just declared my major yesterday!

Yes, that's my Cempaka sweater.

HUGE milestone in my life (lol next thing you know, I might just be one of those desperate college kids filling out the transfer applications...)

I'M NOT GOING TO TELL YOU WHAT IT IS, although some of you probably already know this and shared empathized with my self-deprecating laughter ("Gahhh hahahaha why am I doing this, what is going on in my laaaaifeee???"). Right now (RIGHT THIS SECOND) I'm supposed to be cranking out beautifully worded paraphrases of random scholarly (WHAT THE HECK) articles about _______(let's not tell you what it's about either) but really, what's hindering me from even remotely expressing myself is the unforgiving, hopelessly confining, confusing formatting the paper's supposed to have.

Sigh. *snuggles (for emotional comfort) on the sofa in the Study Center, the only sofa that I can ever nap in, because I (strangely) never nap*

My beautiful friend, EUNICE (without whom, I'll just be a sad open-faced potato-bread sandwich........or be mistaken as a human asian koala =.=).........

Check out photobomb by grad student: Jason =.=

....... is shaving her head tonight in support of St. Baldricks!!! (cancer foundation)

SHE IS SO BEAUTIFUL, I LOVE HER. I can't wait! Shaving her HEAD. If that was me right now, I'd (literally, since coffee's in my system, along with giant "sugarless" smoothies that's absolutely confusing my body like nobody's business) be peeing in my pants.

Alright, 10 minute break over. 1000-page-paper (due today) is in deficit of 983 words.

Challenge accepted (not really).

girl with the supernova fringe

Today I saw a girl sitting outside the materials building in the engineering block. Definitely wasn't the most feminine of the lot, but not the typical jeans/hoodie either. Her hair was short, dirty blonde, dry, and rough -but she had dyed her fringe the most beautiful blend of deep blue, sea green, and... a little bit of pink? The wind played with it. Tossed it around and mocked me. She had her head bent over something with a pencil in hand, so I walked past and casually peered over her work.

She was composing music. It was a manuscript book.

She was composing music. My heart wanted to cry. Again.

withdrawal symptoms

Reading a perfectly good book and you know it's going to end, but you don't want it to, so what do you do? I could read the same sentence again and again.
Doesn't work that way, does it?
Progress is needed, even when progress isn't wanted. Don't like it when things move on, but if things remained stagnant, that sucks.
Pushes you to appreciate the flighting moment all the more, I guess.

Sacrificing it all to missions, I feel, isn't really sacrifice at all. It's way more of a sacrifice to come back.


Honestly I hate hate hate having a single room (in my dorm). The ONLY plus side about a single is that you get to control your sleeping habits. (ehhh even that alone can be bad, if you get what I mean). I did a bunch (only two.... actually, only one.. I did the Myers Briggs a couple of weeks ago... which is surprisingly accurate if you ask me) of personality tests a couple of nights ago. The other was the 5 Love Languages Test.
Don't judge (!!) just because it sometimes appears on obnoxious-looking dating sites.

I scored Quality Time, by far. No wonder my withdrawal symptoms are the most SEVERE I've ever had right now.



Fuller : *overcome by emotion* Awww c'm here Grace... *hug*

*Dylan walks by*

Dylan : *confused* Hey Fuller I wanted to tell you you had something stuck to your side there, but then I realized it was Grace.

Fuller : Yeah it's nothing, just a tiny Asian stuck to my side... 

Dylan : .... yeah that's actually pretty normal on this trip....

me : DYLAN.

Dylan : ?

me : Are you hungry?

Dylan : ?

me : Are you hungry for a Dylan sandwich??? (Come, Eunice!!)
Dylan : Whaa...?

Eunice : OHHH ASIAN SANDWICH! Yeah you know, we're like potato bread. :D And Dylan's the egg salad or something.

Matt : *all emotional* Listen guys, I really wanna say that I'm so encouraged by the testimonies that you gave me the other day..... I'm normally not like that, I've struggled with insecurities and really don't *suddenly notices bug on floor* EEEP!! *smashes bug on floor with foot with frightened look*

me : BAHAHAHAHA... *TOTALLY LAUGHS UNCONTROLLABLY*
*five minutes later*
me : *STILL LAUGHING UNCONTROLLABLY*
*four hours later before going to bed*
me : *STILL LAUGHING*

somebody : Andrew, every time you say "a minute" I think you're saying AMENNN.....

everybody else : LOL

*everybody tumbles down to the lobby late*

Sarah : Guysss! :D wE ReaLLy neEd tO wORk oN ouR PuNctUaliTy!!!!!!!!!!!!! :D :D :D :D :D

Pastor : You know, you really have to watch your words. Once during a missions trip I said I wanted to touch the children in the place and transform their lives, I was so fiercely rejected and misunderstood by all society.........

Me : Andrew. My first impression of you was of, you know, an innocent perfect white little boy.

(..... he got nicknamed to PWB after that...)

Me : *after giving a wholeeee longggg detailed story (i.e. 20 minute speech) about my mother's entire history*

*pause*

Me : Wait.... what was your question again, Sarah?

Sarah : :) Are you like your mother? 

Me : LOLLLLL OMGGGG I'M SO SORRY I TOTALLY WASTED YOUR LIFE HAHAHAHA..

Sarah : HAHAHAHA NO NO IT WAS INTERESTING!!

Emily : Omg. Grace, and Kelly! Grace Kelly!!!!!

*the next day*

Emily : Omg. Mariah, and Carey! Mariah Carey!!!

(Lol, yes we did have four girls named Grace, Kelly, Mariah, and Carey on the trip...)

Me : Fuller?

Fuller : Yes?

Me : Did you know, if we combined our names, it would become Graceful-ler? :D :D

Fuller : Wow. I definitely did not think of that...

*random*

Brandon : *from far far across the room* GRACE!!!!!

Me : BRANDON!!!!!

*repeat for so so so many times in the first couple of days*

Me : *after chatting about random stuff* Yeah, I think I'm pretty gullible in that sense, cuz I can't tell whether you're being sarcastic or not...

Brandon : Wait, what's your name again?

Me : Oh. *innocently and sweetly* I'm Grace. :)

*pause*

Me : *gasps* OMG YOUUUU EVILLLLLLLL *whacks repeatedly*

Brandon : HAHAHAHAHA.

freshmen15 tips!

Tips on surviving/avoiding the Freshmen 15: (dude, I'm like a pro in this)

1. Go in with a friend. Eat slowly. Make it last. 

Talk more than you eat. Build friendships. Make them last.

Quality over quantity.

2. Take only ONE good-sized (you gauge the size yourself) plate, but fill it up real good, so that it looks satisfying. No small portion business that will make you run back and forth like a squirrel.

3. Refer to above, and do not run back and forth like a squirrel (i.e. no going back for seconds, if you didn't get what I meant).

Found this outside the student activities building one Saturday. :'( :'(

4. Steer clear from alfredo sauces, pizzas, hamburgers, fried chicken, frosting, ranch dressing, mayonnaise and too-much stir-fry sauce. (well honey, this is obvious)

5. Make sure your plate is well-balanced. Always, for every meal, a little bit of carbs, protein, dairy (unless you're lactose intolerant, then figure out some other way to get calcium in your body), fats (healthy fats - nuts, avocados, salmon), vegetables, fruit, and H2O. This is such a great tip to keep your body feeling satisfied. This may seem wholly obvious but strangely, it isn't to most people. If you have cereal for dinner, you're NOT gonna feel satisfied even though that was all you were "craving for" cuz you "weren't feeling that hungry." Your body's gonna feel as if something's missing and you will definitely snack horrendously later on at the worst possible times (like, at 1 a.m.). Just be responsible and get all the correct nutrients in your body.

(almost) Unrelated note: What is up with spaghetti that's always, ALWAYS paired with breadsticks/garlic bread? Carbs with a side of more carbs?!

6. Drink water before eating. Drink lots of water throughout the day. Drink tea ("yum cha").

7. With that said, pee before eating. HAHA. Is it just me? I feel more in tune with my body and less susceptible to overeating when my bladder's empty. Sorry TMI?

8. Don't touch the sugary stuff. Once you touch the sugary stuff, you WILL eat even more sugary stuff (i.e. skip dessert as many times as possible. Works wonders.) There's a theory going around that says you crave for the things you most recently ate, until you spam it and finallyyy become sick of it (cereal, in my case, all the freaking time).

9. No smoothies, unless it's no-added-sugar (and you don't like chewing your foods, because some smoothies are perfectly capable of being meal replacers, just like some granola bars) then that's fine. By no-added-sugar, I didn't mean smoothies spammed with aspartame or sorbitol. They should be whole foods, natural stuff. Homogenous mush is not my kinda thing, but to each their own.

10. Eat breakfast. You've heard this one before, so many times. With that said, also, don't eat too much for breakfast. *face palm* No such thing as eating "breakfast like a king, lunch like a prince, and dinner like a pauper." You = Commoner. All day long you are an ordinary commoner.

Breakfast: not that hard, here you go. I've got you covered. ;P

11. Absolutely NO snacking. No. Snacking. At. All. (unless you have a colossal sense of portion-control) Your body will lose the natural sense of hunger and satiety because snacks are awesome and you cannot stop once you've started. (Just don't buy snacks. Just don't.)

12. Try to eat at fixed times. Keep your body in that pattern so that it knows what to expect. Dinner at 4.30 p.m. is not exactly ideal. 

13. CHEW GUM. ALL THE TIME. Plus, it gives you fresh breath. 

14. Go to the gym. Ever felt like eating 3 slices of chocolate cake right after sweating it out? Don't think so. 

15. Most importantly, remember that food is fuel. Enjoy it with loved ones, but don't center the meeting around mere perishables. Build memories, have lovely conversations. Dwell.

16. Even more importantly, just listen to your own body. Your body is also a very forgiving organism if you mess up once or twice. Respect your body for it's the only one you'll ever have.

#fatkidwoes

The Grace before America = STONE-COLD SELF-CONTROL AND RESILIENCE (*waving molten brownies around* "Are you surrreeee you don't want???") + no miles
The Grace after America = "Second bowl of swirled ice-milk & fresh chocolate peanut butter? :D " + 5 miles

Everything balances out I guess.


#fatkidwoes

My new favorite thing from Nihao - chicken pad thai.
Mmmmmm.

first picture of spring

The most gorgeous I've ever seen of the Gooch-Dillard bridge

Fitzhugh?

The ONLY time it snowed the entire of winter.

Took about 50 photos on the way to my morning physics class.

***

Blossoms outside the chem building

Spring is here! :)

the debut of peace

How precious did that grace appear,

The hour I first believed.

Melodrama could be a virtue; it makes everything seem more colorful.

Most importantly, it makes love even more special and intimate.

"I'm so glad everybody on this trip is big on physical touch." *hug*

Nine years. I don't ever want to be jaded.

***

AAAAHHHHH I'M BACK FROM MY SPRING BREAK!!!! Went to Atlanta, Georgia, for a spring break missions trip with a Chi Alpha team for a week. Partnered with the Dream Center (kind of like a church outreach thing) and helped minister to the locals in the area - the homeless, prostitutes, impossible children, peers from Georgia Tech, random businessmen on the train station, jobless hispanics.... generally, just EVERY person we managed to bump into.

Ask me more. I have a beautiful testimony to share.

I have remarkable peace in my heart. :)

"I feel peace, so settled. It's almost like a game of Tetris, 
in which you keep trying so hard to fit in the blocks but always miss one or two. 

Now I feel like I've been given the special block for the perfect fit, 
and it settled lovingly, like a comfortable glove."


"Grace I love your metaphors." 

AND I've acquired a beautiful family, each unique personality so, SO much
appreciated and blessed.

alembic

My professor teaches materials as if he's lecturing his (freaking) grandchildren. He has that specific way of speaking that makes you feel embarrassed no matter what, even if he was just paying you compliments (omggg), or picking on you to answer questions (omggg).

And yet love him (as a person) at the same time.

***


There was this girl (she sat right in front on the first row under the professor's nose) who was sketching during my (totally unrelated) class today (on an A2 block of paper, can you say: distracting?) and it made me want to cry sooo bad because I miss pouring out my soul into something artistic of any form.


I just discovered the running track at the balcony of my gym the other day. I mean, I always knew it was there. It beats running on the treadmill, where you just focus on numbers instead of the actual act of running. (Plus, you get to check out the basketball game beneath you)

Numbers do not define you.

Nonsense. They totally do. Grades, time, calories, weight, math 

(just kidding, math doesn't involve numbers anymore)...

Nonsense.

Dry and shriveled rose

Now, the seconds are slipping by, and I have a midterm tomorrow.


It's getting increasingly harder and harder to feed myself everyday. My body doesn't feel like it wants anything anymore................... except sleep. Definitely sleep.
And coffee.
And water.
And sleep.

lent

They're the most important, and they're the hardest to sacrifice. Sometimes the words that leave my lips are moulded in such a flat line - long, deep and thin, you know?
Wishes, aspirations, useless daydreaming - they all contribute to time. I am antsy about time.
Time urgency is a strong issue to me; I am impatient. I worry about making full use of my time, and in that process, I waste time.
Once again, ironic isn't it?


Time - the indefinite continued process of existence and events in the past, present and future regarded as a whole.


***

LIFE CRISIS. DECLARING MAJOR IN ABOUT <3 WEEKS. <---- less than three weeks

shredded coconut

So, I got a haircut. Finally.

Sister: Yes yes, I'll cut it for you, I know it looks like a broomstick and I am painfully reminded of it every single time I see you.
Me: *mixed expressions of gratitude and... =.= (but really, more of gratitude)*

OMGGGG YESSSSSS. FINALLY. I FEEL LIKE MYSELF AGAIN.
*valiantly tosses hair about*

Imagined conversation with old high school friend: Dudeeee you don't look any different.....

Since now tying my hair up in a ponytail is still no elegant affair (from a broomstick to a fluffy rabbit tail), I've been walking around with my hair down.

NOBODY RECOGNIZED ME. Goodness. Enthusiastically giving greetings along with extremelyyyy energetic waving (you know me), only to receive blank stares.

Gina: Omg I couldn't recognize you. You look so different with your hair down.
Jane: OH MY GOD. GRACE. GRACE. YOU. YOU HAVE BANGS. Dude... you look so different with your hair down.
Lauren: Eeep! Grace! :D Your hair looks gorgeous!!! :D Aww you are so beautiful. :D (only because she's an absolute sweetheart and I texted her about my haircut).... but I wanted to see a picture. You didn't send me one. You stink.
Coco: Oooh Gwaaace you look different with your hair dawwhhhnnnnn..... :D
Comfort: OH. GRACE. Wow. I couldn't recognize you. I was wondering who this strange girl was, waving at me like that. You look so different with your hair down.
Chelsea: .... OH MY. Grace!!! Look at you! I could hardly recognize you. You look so different with your hair down.
Carlos: *says nothing*


(LOL. GUYS.)


YES YES I GET THE MESSAGE. *face palm* But naturally I feigned surprise at each (different and individually unique) reaction.

Did absolutely nothing today. :) I ONLY have one midterm this coming week (lol) so the weekend was all set up for party-time (lol).

Brian: Oooooh partaayy!!! *raises eyebrows with sneaky smile*

And by "party-time" I really meant sleeping and treating myself to nice food.

Wow that's my definition of a party. I grow old. I die.

Spent the day with Gina. We really wanted gourmet breads (i.e. anything non-dining hall food) but there was no direct bus to Great Harvest Bread Co (AMAZING BAKERY, with 8 USD loaves that are totally worth it) and we weren't sure if we could actually walk there (highways? We jaywalked the crazy Hydraulic intersection and I'm absolutely NOT going to do that ever again.)

The chicken noodle soup was... wait where's the soup... :(

Stuck with Panera.

We heart chai tea lattes

Unrelated note: I just discovered chai tea lattes!!! Spammed them at the Einstein Bros Bagels at Rice Hall while studying for materials and CS. SO GOOD. And I've spent an ungodly amount of plus dollars the past week. Like... over 50 bucks of plus dollars. I now have a lot of cereal in my room. The C Store is such a rip off. 1 box of kashi cereal for 7.15 USD!??!?!
UVa. WHAT is up with you.

So anyway, lunch was just meh, okay, but we knew we wanted these:

SWEET FROG!!!

The only reason we went to Barracks anyway. Discovered it's Gina's birthday tomorrow so I had to treat her to some!

MINE
Froyo flavors: original tart, irish mint, peanut butter, NY cheesecake.
Toppings: fruity pebbles (yay!), flax seeds (double yay!), shredded coconut (triple yay!)
And a couple of honey wheat pretzel sticks

THEY HAVE AWESOME TOPPINGS.

I mean, flax seeds? :D Coconut?!? Yay! They even have oat bran and wheat germ! Protein powder, juice poppers... those who know me know that I don't really like to put any toppings on my froyo.

But who can resist all these? :)

SO much better than Arch's!

Did you know SweetFrog stands for Fully Rely On God? :)
How nice.
I love supporting them. :) They have a self-serve concept, very much like the Tutti Frutti back home in Malaysia, in which they price your concoction based on weight.

I paiseh bring my own banana and slice into Tutti Fruittis back home. BANANAS ARE HEAVY OKAY.

Yumza.

18 different flavors! Taste-test frenzy!

Spring break is in a week! Isn't it crazy how quickly time flies?

We found these in Barnes and Noble:

Aren't these such a wonderful concept? Imagine going through the pages, seeing how your thoughts, dreams and aspirations change over the years, jotted down in neat dated sections.

Huh.